In a lot of ways, my time at my current college has been surprising. Suffice it to say, I attend a small, conservative Christian college that's values in many ways seemed to reflect my own. Yet my time here has taught me that this is not necessarily the case. Don't get me wrong; honest discussion and disagreement can be fantastic, and civil discourse can help everyone understand where the other side is coming from.
"Nah, I'd rather keep dehumanizing everyone who disagrees with me."
As great as honest, free and civil discussion can be, however, there comes a point where continual disagreement can become discouraging. Its ironic that I'm overwhelmed with disagreement and aggravation at a college I suspected would be too harmonious. On many issues that are important to me, like theology and politics, I find myself struggling to find any common ground with even my closest of friends.
"What did I tell you about getting drunk and screaming about Ron Paul, Jeremy?"
Now I specify that I disagree about these topics with my friends because these are personal matters that I don't discuss with everyone. Unfortunately, many of my college's culture ideals also stand in stark contrast to my personal beliefs, which only furthers my sense of alienation here. Now, you may be inclined to laugh at or dismiss the aspects of this college's culture that bother me, but just hear (or would it be "read" in this case) me out.
1. Tobacco use is incredibly prevalent at my college.
Its perfectly fair for you to want to immediately dismiss my first point. After all, young people everywhere smoke, and how does that affect me? And who do I think I am trying to dictate how other people choose to live their lives? I mean, seriously, its clear at this point that I need to get off my high horse.
First, I don't write this to morally condemn people who choose to smoke. I have many wonderful friends who choose to use tobacco in one manner or another, and that is entirely their life choice. Period. I don't think colleges should outright ban tobacco use. But when I get into serious arguments with the smokers who say that it is a violation of their personal rights for the school to enact a ban against smoking within 15 feet of buildings, I can't help but be a little offended. I know you have rights, but do my rights as a non-smoker who doesn't want to breathe in your poison mean nothing?
"Nah, I'm sure this stuff is harmless."
And again, I realize that I can come off as judgmental and holier-than-thou, but this really isn't my intention. I've lost two family members who I love very much to lung cancer, one as a direct result of a lifetime of cigarette use. I hate tobacco companies, and believe that they are staffed by manipulative bastards who prey on young people by selling them addictive carcinogens. Am I biased? Obviously, but I still can't understand how someone can choose to do this to themselves after all the research that has been released connecting tobacco use to serious health problems. Of course, this isn't the only thing I can't understand about my college...
2. Frat culture is overwhelmingly prevalent at my college
This one may come as a surprise to a lot of you, especially the younger readers. And once again, I'm going to approach this topic as carefully as I can in the least judgmental manner possible.
First, everyone can choose how to live their own lives. Its not my business if you want to drink or party or whatever. Everyone who knows me realizes that I certainly like a good drink as much as anyone.
That being said, its the culture and mindset of fraternities that really bothers me. Maybe I'm too sensitive, but I don't like leader figures hoarding natural desires like social acceptability over the heads of young impressionable freshmen. Maybe I exaggerate, but lets think about this, how many students would honestly go through all of the embarrassing, humiliating and degrading nonsense that frats require if they weren't desperate to achieve popularity and fun?
"Mhmhmh...I know I would."
This isn't even to mention the studies that have shown that frats encourage harmful lifestyles, like alcohol abuse and reckless behavior (and did we really need a study to tell us any of these things?!?!) Now I'll admit that most of the frats at my college are harmless, and that I'm a bit uptight and probably upset that I'm not having as much fun as they are, but any word that condones behavior like this should not be used to describe peer groups at my college. Just my opinion.
3. The political justifications they used to explain their beliefs
Perhaps the most frustrating thing about my debates with other students here is that we can't even agree that we have the same fundamental ideas or motives. At this college, many of the people that I've run into put such a strong emphasis on personal rights and liberty that all other logic seems to be thrown out the window. These are the libertarians/ radical conservatives who would argue against laws requiring hospitals to treat dying patients who can't afford to pay their medical bills. These are the people who vehemently argue against smoking restrictions, as my right to breathe clean air is apparently less important than the smoker's convenience. Frats should exist not because they are good or even harmless, but because students have a right to form them.
It is at this point that we have to, once again, call off these frustrated debacles we call arguments. If we can't even agree that human "rights" should be limited sometimes to ensure greater societal good and justice, then how can we hope to ever understand each other or come to agree about anything?
Alright, it is now 3:30 AM. Writing this tonight was probably a bad decision, but honestly, sometimes I feel like I'm the only sane person here. I guess I've always been a man of strong opinions and convictions, but I can't understand how anyone could see the world differently than me on these issues.
It is at this point that I'm forced to hope that even though I still can't fully understand why other people think the way that they do, perhaps each day I can develop a greater respect and appreciation for their convictions. I know that I don't know everything, and I realize the fact that sometimes I think that I do is simply a testament to my own youth and immaturity.
Unfortunately, issues of policy and theology, freedom and justice go beyond clean intellectual, emotionless discussion. Rather, they impact my unique vision of how I believe the world should be. They drive me to fight for change in areas where many of my friends simply wouldn't agree with me. To them, I'm too bitter and opinionated, but from my own perspective, I wonder how anyone could tolerate all of these "problems" (from my perspective) when there clearly must be better alternatives. Nevertheless, I realize that I need to speak less and be more civil when I do. Oh well, maybe someday I'll know enough to know I don't know everything.
Side Note: This blog is used to express my opinions in a humorous and often outlandish fashion. No matter how civil I become, my humorous (hopefully) rants on this blog will not change. Look forward to this year's annual Valentine's Day entry. Bahahaha.
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ReplyDeleteI'm glad you've found somewhere other than Facebook to vent your frustrations and make known your opinions, Chris.
ReplyDeleteI'm surprised at your college, having visited it myself. As you know I go to a public college. There is a no smoking policy on all portions of school grounds. Though it is poorly enforced, I only occasionally see anyone smoking on campus. I think you have some pretty selfish friends if they think it's ok to make other people breath in their second hand smoke. Anyway have a happy v-day.
Ryan
AMEN sir, well done. You can imagine my delight reading my thoughts written in the words of another; and of curse it was written in classic Stephano style.
ReplyDelete