Pretty cool, just don't see the movie

It's not very often that I get fan art, so I thought I would display a few works of my blog's one confirmed regular reader. One fan and counting...Yes!






For sending pieces of fan work, or contacting the author of this blog, please send to: Stephdaddy4ever@yahoo.com.

The Greatest (and Most Hysterical) Game of All

It's March. The snow is melting, the weather is warming, and its time for baseball. That's right, thanks to the only good idea of the used-car-salesman-turned-senile-old-man-turned-commissioner-of-baseball (I F***** LOVE DASHES, AND CAPITALS!) Bud Selig, we can now enjoy the rich crack of the bat and pop of high heat as early as March via the World Baseball Classic.

"Where am I?"



That's right, I said baseball, not college basketball. For while March Madness might prompt many an American parent to sell their children into slavery in a third-world country to afford tickets during these unbearably tough times (see previous entry), the rest of the world remains undaunted. Props to Europe for finally getting something right, now we need to have a serious conversation about soccer...

There are many reasons as to why the rest of the world embraces baseball: the history of the game, its mix of leisure and strategy that truly sets it apart, or its unique ability to, every once in a while, send us to our knees in a seizure of uncontrollable laughter. May I present the following...

For those of you who don't know, the World Baseball Classic is an 16-team international baseball tournament. Teams include the US, Canada, Mexico, South Africa,as well as several Latin American teams, a few Asian teams and a European team or two. While many of these teams have legitimate players from major league rosters, some teams do not, prompting the development of gutter teams such as South Africa, Italy, the Netherlands, etc. The tournament is also highlighted by a few powerhouses, like the Dominican (where they have more MLB All-Stars per capita than people), Venezuela (Hugo Chavez is apparently a tremendous pitching coach), the United States, and Japan. In any other sport besides baseball, these powerhouses would continually dominate and win every time. Cue Sidney Ponson...


Yes, this guy, I swear.

Yes, Sidney Ponson, just the kind of mediocrity a nation that passes out free drug needles needs, was slated to start for his Netherlands against the heavily-favored Dominican Republic. This is the same Sidney Ponson who boasts an ERA around 5, bouncing around from team to team like uniforms run out of style.

But wait, the story get better. The obese mediocre pitcher who looks kind of like one of your old drinking buddies may have in fact been one of previously-mentioned buddies. Ponson has been charged with multiple DUI's, and once, in truly angry drunk fashion, was arrested for assaulting a judge. That's right, he somehow managed to get arrested in the Netherlands! Science has yet to show us how this is possible; for now, it remains a mystery like the properties of light or why people listen to celebrities for advice (a celebrity teaching us the importance of self-esteem, does anyone else see the irony?).

"If you don't vote for Barack Obama, you shall all burn in hell...and you will never know what book to read!


Anyway, in the midst of facing one of the best teams in the world, the Netherlands found it fitting to call on your old beer buddy to snatch victory from the jaws of defeat. And guess what, he actually did it, pitching four decent innings on way to securing a 3-2 Netherlands victory. Only in baseball could this happen. Oh, sure, there have been underdogs before, but how many of them involve a character this frequently hammered before?


"I almost make movies believable."

In light of this, let's take a moment to truly appreciate the one place where hysterical underdog stories actually happen, on the baseball diamond.

PLAY BALL!